Children’s Stubbornness – Causes and Treatment – Shafqat Ali
It is said that children’s problems don’t happen only in the home where there are no children. Otherwise, every parent and conscious person somehow faces a new problem from the children every day. At the top of all these issues and the common problem found in every home is stubbornness. No matter how good the attitude of the parents, no matter how gentle they are or how much they love the children, the children are still stubborn. As if it is the birthright of children.
What is stubbornness? Stubbornness is an emotional problem that a person reacts to. If this psychosis of reaction is suppressed or not treated in time, it can become a psychological problem. It is important that parents and teachers take note of this problem in the children and seek immediate treatment.
Psychologists say that because every child is unique, there are many types of children. We can also say that there are many types of stubbornness. However, we will mention here only those four types which are generally found in children.
The first type of stubbornness is irritability, which is caused by a child’s physical weakness or illness. Such children often make excuses to keep crying and asking for things. Even if they attain the thing, they still do not keep quiet, but find another reason and start crying again. The treatment for this type of stubbornness is to have the child checked by a nutritionist or pediatrician. Follow the diet, medication and precautions that they recommend.
The second reason for stubbornness is unnecessary pampering and ease up the child completely. When the child realizes that his every word is obeyed and every demand is met, he becomes accustomed to stubbornness. He knows that just a little bit of stubbornness will fulfill his every wish, so he is stubborn. The cure is that parents change their behavior. Be gentle in your mood and be friendly but not frankly. Be sure to meet the child’s fair wishes and demands. If the child asks for something that is harmful, expensive or unsuitable, give the child a replacement. Here you have to use your skill of convincing others. This skill will help you a lot in overcoming the child’s stubbornness.
The third cause of stubbornness is situational, i.e. the child sometimes does such stubbornness. For example, I do not go to school today; I do not meet a particular person; I have to do this work, etc. The cure for this stubbornness is to understand the child’s point of view and the reasons for his stubbornness that why the child is suddenly adopting this attitude. By finding such causes, this stubbornness can be cured.
The fourth type of stubbornness is arrogance, rudeness and aggression, which are mostly noted in adolescence. This problem can be hormonal as well as psychological. It is caused due to unfulfilled desires in the subconscious of children or lack of cooperation, love and time from parents. Children tolerate everything in childhood, but as soon as they begin to grow up, they do not obey their parents & adults, react and do as they want. They don’t hesitate to insult others if they are restricted for doing something. The first solution to this problem is to try not to get this far and if it does, start giving the child time. Talk to him and try to understand his feelings. Convince him with love. This can take a long time, so you need to be consistent. At the same time, keep on praying to Allah for help, guidance and good training for the child, with the belief that prayer is the weapon of the believer and prayer changes destiny.