Some tips for a successful life
People and their worries:
In my preaching life, I have an experience with regards to most people. That is, people often suffer from anxiety and problems in their personal lives and do not know the right way to deal with them. As a result, they are constantly experiencing mental anguish, tension, stress, and so on. These cognitive and psychological behaviors turn into physical illnesses over the years. This leads to physical problems as well as financial problems. Further, due to mental issues, irritability and bitterness take over the human temperament which often results in breakdown of mutual affairs and relationships. Hence, when problems and worries are not appropriately dealt with, more issues arise.
This is not just a problem for the people around us. But it is a global problem for humans living in the industrial and information age. Due to the importance and scope of this issue, countless people have worked on this topic and pointed out the attitudes that modern man can adopt to get out of the vortex of problems. I look at this whole work in two parts. One is Crisis management that deals with overcoming a crisis situation or coping with it in better means. The other is self-management that discusses ways to improve everyday life. I intend to train my close friends by compiling a course on these two topics. But for the readers also, I will discuss some valuable points in this regard through which they will be able to fight against the above problems.
Some additional issues of ours:
We are not only facing all the problems of the modern industrial and the information age but unfortunately, some other issues are also making the situation worse and worse. For example, poverty and illiteracy are widespread in our country. Therefore, all the problems arising in this regard are present here with full force. Poverty is increasing people’s issues, and illiteracy does not allow them to solve these problems. For example, regarding the West, I have stated that great work is done in problem-solving and improving life quality. Still, due to illiteracy and lack of reading habits, our people are deprived of the benefits of this exceptional literature.
It is also a fact that nearly all the education and training institutions in our country have been destroyed or are not doing their job properly. For example, in the ancient family and community system, elders used to guide children and youth. But now, this system is failing. The role of teachers is limited to teaching. Scholars are more interested in politics and sectarianism. The same is true of intellectuals who see no problem other than politics. They neither understand the individual’s life and issues nor are they are the subject of their interest.
The media, unfortunately, does not make such topics its subject. By its very nature, the media is not an educational institution. It is an institution of information and entertainment. However, in our case, the tragedy is that the media is causing more problems and worries in many ways. Especially the news media, which has become a significant source of creating thrill, fear, and tension. Similarly, superficial and sometimes vulgar entertainment on the media does not leave enough time for people to take some time out to study.
My preface has been a bit long but this is the situation where, on one hand, my goal is to preach the original religion based on Qur’an and Sunnah to address monotheism and hereafter and, on the other hand, I have to try and resolve people’s issues individually. In this context, in today’s meeting, I will put some minor things in front of the readers, which can significantly improve their lives. Also, people overwhelmed with worries and problems will feel a lot of relief by adopting them. Obviously, not much detail is possible in this short article. So, in a nutshell, I am explaining some basic things. However, it would not be correct to think that I am cracking some jokes. Unlike headaches, life’s ups and downs cannot disappear by taking two aspirins. Nor are they like stains on clothes that can’t be washed with soap so cleaned by a particular chemical. To solve them, one has to change one’s thinking perspective. Some serious decisions have to be made and to see through matters differently.
Although there are some basic principles, I will also mention practical and straightforward examples that can solve many life problems as quickly as tips. But first, start with some essential discussions so that the basics of a permanent personality change become apparent. Now, let’s look at these basic principles.
Use your strength:
Allah Almighty has endowed man with extraordinary abilities. Despite being extremely unusual, most of these abilities do their own job from beginning to end. For example, inside human beings, a very novel system converts flora and fauna into energy by making them food. This digestive system is so unusual and complex that thousands of books have been written on its details. Even the slightest malfunction in this system shakes human life. But this unique system works as an automatic machine from beginning till end. It produces chemicals for appetite in the mouth. With the help of teeth, lips, tongue, and throat, the system starts chewing, holding, tasting, and swallowing. Consequently, food becomes part of the body, or a nonessential portion of the food gets excreted from the body. Man has only a formal role in it, and this is the case with the countless other systems in the human body.
Along with the physical abilities, Allah Almighty has endowed man with the most extraordinary psychological powers which can perform great miracles. But this mental capacity does not work as automatically as the physical capacity. Instead, it is up to man to discover and use this ability. In fact, this psychological ability is the hallmark of man, which makes him unique from other creatures. Otherwise, capabilities like physical systems, etc., are also given to animals. But unfortunately, people are even unable to discover their original powers rather than using it. Destiny, circumstances, environment, and training shape them, and the outside world molds them as it pleases. They are always crying about their problems and never discovering the inner strength that they can use to change their lives and the lives of others.
This psychological power of man has many facets. His intelligence, memory, imagination, ability to analyze are its essential aspects. But the utmost part is man’s willpower, determination, and spirit. This is the thing that once a person discovers, he can solve every problem of life in one way or another or reduce its intensity. Not only this, he can bring every blessing and goodness in his life.
But most people leave this willpower at the mercy of circumstances. They suffer from frustration and depression. Whatever tragedy or event befalls them, they accept it as their destiny. Wherever the currents of life take them, they move silently in that direction without moving their hands and feet. Their life is a drama in which their job is to act on external conditions and scripts written by others. What I want to explain is that this is the status of plants and animals. Man can create and change his own life story, and he is not an actor but the director of the drama of life.
So in this context, if you want to improve your life, first of all, the key is to use willpower and determination to make it better. Decide that your life will not be decided by external circumstances but by your own decisions. You will try to improve your situation. There will definitely be difficulties along the way, and there will be repeated failures. But you will continue hitting the hammer of your iron will on the wall of problems till that wall collapse completely.
In short, willpower, determination, the decision to try numerous times, and forgetting past failures is the key that will ultimately solve your every problem. Arise with the conviction that you are not helpless but are the sovereign human being in whom Allah has breathed His soul. Because of this soul, you have the divine grace that can make the impossible, possible.
What is your mission?
The path to success and happiness takes another turn after the determination to change oneself. If you do not select this turn, then you will never be genuinely happy. This turn asks you that what the purpose of your life is. Like overlooking willpower, people are not aware of the purpose and mission of life and how it guarantees your happiness and success. In fact the truth is, if you have never thought about it, you are not really aware of true happiness and real success.
Buying new fashion clothes, eating the food of your choice, building a house of your own taste, etc., seem to be things of success and happiness. But the fact is that these are very superficial things, and they have nothing to do with genuine joy and real success. Their tragedy is that as soon as you get them, they become insignificant in your eyes. Now that they’ve lost their attraction, you are forced to run after something new but superficial. It’s like running after a mirage, running all your life but unable to find true happiness and contentment. Instead, the struggle for these things and the troubles that arise will spoil all the enjoyment.
On the contrary, once you have determined the purpose and mission of life, your life will be on the right track. You will create a measure of your happiness and contentment that not only is possible for you to achieve, but you will never get bored of what you will achieve. Instead, it will be the greatest asset of your life. The hardships, worries, tremors of life, and deprivation by the rotation of time will be ineffective on you.
The purpose and mission of each individual may vary depending on the circumstances and his taste. From an ordinary housewife to an enthusiastic young man and an old man to the head of an organization, this mission can take shape in a unique way to his own circumstances. For example, for a housewife, the task may be to train her family well, provide a pleasant home environment, and educate and nurture children. While for a business person, this mission is to provide lawful employment for people other than oneself and provision of wealth for the support of religion. Whatever the task, the important thing is that the basis of the mission should be moral. From the above examples, it is clear that there may be material elements in the mission, i.e., acquisition of wealth or higher education of children. Still, it is necessary to include high moral principles in its basis. Material mission alone cannot bring true happiness to man. For example, suppose a person’s mission is to build a luxurious house for himself. In that case, when he reaches the brink of success, he will know that this success will be snatched from him sooner or later.It has lost its appeal for him. Or, behind this success, he has taken the path of oppression and sin. In any case, man will be deprived of true happiness and peace. While in a mission based on moral principles, man always finds peace of mind. Even if the mission’s materialistic aspect fails, the contentment of the success of the mission’s ethical principles is a great blessing in any case.
Two aspects of the mission:
Another thing is crucial in terms of mission. That there should be two sides to it. One is what you want to be in life. The other is what you have to do in life. Some examples have already been mentioned above of what to do in life. Now understand the meaning of what to be in life. It does not mean to be a pilot or a doctor in life, as kids usually say. Instead, it means that you have to decide how to mold your personality. Which of the high human and moral qualities along with cultural and religious attitudes have to be created in oneself? This part of the mission is more complicated than the part of doing something in life. But as a result, man is enlightened with absolute joy and happiness. Because then he becomes what he wants to be, not what his circumstances and environment made him.
Understand this with a few more examples. Suppose you decided to use your willpower to change your life after reading this article of mine. When you set out on a life mission, you realize some very unpleasant traits in your personality due to past circumstances and training, like showing unreasonable, extreme, and repeated anger. Or you may feel that you are too talkative and it create problems for you. Now you decide that you have to get rid of this habit. For this, you have to take every possible way to get rid of this habit. You have to learn from your mistakes and other people’s experience and find a way to improve with the help of study, the righteous and the intellectuals. Besides repeated mistakes, you will get better. Every success will increase your prestige in your eyes and also in the eyes of others. You will focus more on character building rather than materialistic achievements. The result is that happiness and contentment will gradually envelop you.
In the same way, you see that some other people have some superior qualities that you do not have. After that, you have the desire to build these qualities in yourself. So you start struggling for it. These qualities will begin to develop in you in a matter of time. But keep in mind that the spirit of self-improvement must always be alive. Never be discouraged by failure.
In short, make self-improvement your life’s mission. This mission will give you an asset of happiness and peace that nothing else can ever give. It will also change your outlook on life and its problems. However, problems are a part of life. So I also want to discuss some ways to deal with them. In the same way, after setting a mission, it is a task to adapt life to it. These two issues will be discussed sometime in the next one or two months, God willing.